Can I be done now?

Seriously.  I'd like to be done with all this health...ehem, insert expletive...stuff.  I really would.  But I'm not.  And I'm tired of having to go through all these emotions and trying to write them down on my blog.  Cause I don't want to.  I'm over it.  So over it.  I guess I could not write about it.  But then I think I might have another long hiatus.  Again.  And I don't think I want that either.

I always have a good cry whenever traumatic or bad things happen.  It doesn't always happen right away either.  It could be a week or weeks later.  Yeah.  I had that today in the doctor's office.  One of the many doctors I see.  Only I got interrupted.  So I was thinking I may pick it back up again.  Bwahahahah!

I saw the hematologist today.  I didn't want to.  I figured she would be upset that the filter didn't come out.  I was right.  As in...she wants me to go back in again, to a different doc, and have that horrible, awful, no-good, very bad procedure done to me...again!  Did I say 'again' enough???

Do you ever get the feeling that life is being dictated to you rather than the other way around?  I've felt that way before.  I don't like it much.  I especially don't like it when it concerns my health and I've got all these docs that I've got to coordinate with...of course THEY won't coordinate with each other...and get them all on the same page.  Which they NEVER are.  And I'm no medical expert.  Especially about this.  When they all say different things, it certainly doesn't help.

If you ask me why I have to have the filter out...I guess the reasoning is because having a foreign body inside isn't the best thing plus I will have to be on blood thinners for life if it stays in.  As it was put to me, "You don't want that do you?"  Heh.

Meanwhile I was looking up information about IVC filters and found some good pictures.  Here's basically what it looks like...

Here's a medical article about it.  I don't like medical articles much but it was interesting to me cause it was all about what's inside me!  Anyway...there are some great photos in the article here.  There's one of what it looks like inside your body. ;D

Ok.  That's all I have to say at the moment.  I think more of my life took over and I can't go and have the rest of that good cry.  Too many people need me and too many dang things to do.

5 Responses

  1. Jen
    I'm so sorry, Jen. Doctors and hospitals and surgeries STINK! And not being able to deal with your feelings without interruption is awful too. Don't worry about blogs and deadlines. Worry about yourself...for once!
  2. Jeni
    I agree with everyone! Although when I first saw the photo of the filter I thought it was one of those head massager thingys-have you seen them? :) Is there a 3rd doc that you can get another opinion from? (Why am I asking you questions here?? I must talk to youuuuu) You are wonderful, and will be praying for you and your Fantabulous Family.
  3. Dear Jen, it is so awful, I understand. Please, let them do their work again, think about your children and your family. I are so special,we all who read your blog need you too! Big big HUGS from all members of my family!
  4. Wendy N
    I'm sorry Jen! I know your definitely not looking forward to them trying that procedure again, I wouldn't. That filter looks awful, ugh! So glad you read the article though, it might just help you understand a bit better what is going on and then again it may be to much too. Cry all you want...wish I could be there so you could cry on my shoulder. Keep your chin up and be positive! We are here for you!
  5. Ann
    Jen, this is awful, but I have admit that I am happy you would try again to get it out, it would be done and soon it would be part of the past, hung in there friend. Relax about the blog also, we all know and we would he here when you are ready. Love, Ann